Tuesday, October 11, 2011

I am.

They say that time heals all wounds.

I'm not sure I believe them.

In this moment, it seems this wound is too big to heal. Every tentatively formed scab rips off, exposing the pus-filled pain beneath. Anger. Envy. Sorrow. Bitterness. Doubt.

Drowning in tears and drowning again. Hurricanes and steady rains but always always tears and sadness and pain and questions.

How long, O Lord?

Too long. Too much.

The sun comes out.

The pain numbs, subsides. Dull throbbing always there. Slow leak of salt from eyes.

But a smile to the world, always a smile. Hiding a hurt that no one knows. Smile, wipe eyes. Blame allergies--it's fall, after all.

They say the physical act of smiling can make you feel happy, can release endorphins. Drugs from the brain for the wounds of the heart.

I'm not sure I believe them.

Find the rainbow in the rain.

Linked up with Heather of The EO's Just Write, a weekly exercise in free writing ordinary and extra-ordinary moments.

1 comment:

  1. thank you for pouring out your heart. may you find peace in the writing and the wrestling.